Well apparently he's into motor boating.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Randomize