Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
