It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
he puts the penis in happiness.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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