I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
