Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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