I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
