the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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