hell yes lets make some ravioli
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
