Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
