This is not my ceiling
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i think we sleep fucked last night...
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
