just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize