He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
