dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize