? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize