I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
