There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
