did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize