I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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