I cannot find my penis.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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