would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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