Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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