I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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