I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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