why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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