S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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