I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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