Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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