i don't like sucking hair
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
