Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
