what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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