goodnight i made you a song goodbye
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
