dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
