I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
that is very illegal...i love you.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
