Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
