You're so nebulous sometimes
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
