Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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