She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
