i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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