every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
