Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
