Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
