what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
