Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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