he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
