I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
