Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
