Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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