my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
