i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
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