dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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