Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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