We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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