So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
